For years, business owners have asked me, “How can I guarantee my good employees will stay?” I’ve been answering this question since one of my first Facebook videos back in 2016. The truth is you can’t force employees to stay. What you can control is creating an environment where they want to.
As a leader, you get to decide how you show up in your role and for your team. That means, you get to impact the experience your team has in the workplace.
In each interaction, you are either creating a stay moment or a leave moment.
These are the moments where your behaviour either supports the employee staying or encourages them to leave. This reminds me of the concept of emotional bank accounts Steven Covey introduces in The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Emotional Bank Accounts are a metaphor in which you are either adding to or taking from the account. In every positive interaction, like being kind, giving the benefit of the doubt, following through and having an employee’s back, adds to the balance, which builds trust. On the flip side, actions like ignoring, blaming or degrading the other person, takes away from the balance of the account and erodes trust. When the positives outweigh the negatives, relationships feel strong, confident and psychologically safe. These relationships can typically weather any storm. When the negatives outweigh the positives even small issues can become bigger issues because people don’t feel safe and there is no trust in the relationship. This idea of the Emotional Bank Account reinforces how your action or inaction is what builds or erodes trust and loyalty thus impacting retention.
Let’s go through two scenarios to demonstrate between adding to or taking from the emotional bank account.
Encouraging Employees to Leave
A manager calls a team meeting after a project misses the mark. Without asking questions, the manager immediately points out mistakes, accuses the team of little effort, and compares this outcome to past failures. When someone tries to explain a challenge they ran into, the manager cuts them off, dismisses any conversation and warns the employees to improve or else. The group leaves the room feeling deflated, hesitant to speak up next time, and less motivated to go the extra mile. They turn on each other, complain about the job, co-workers and their manager.
Encouraging Employees to Stay
After a similar project setback, the leader brings the team together and starts by acknowledging the effort and time everyone put in. The leader asks open questions to understand what got in the way and genuinely listens without interrupting. They share their own responsibility in the outcome and invite ideas for improving next time. The team leaves feeling respected, heard, and more committed to finding a better path forward together. They start brainstorming ways to improve for next time and support each other in achieving the goals.
These scenarios might sound extreme, but let me assure you, they are not. Encouraging employees to leave happens more often than we want to admit.
Warning signs of an employee on their way out
There are behavioral indicators that signal an employee could leave. Notice what is happening to your group:
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- Reduced participation in team meetings and discussion
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- Less initiative, stops volunteering ideas
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- Withdrawal from the group
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- Increased absenteeism
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- Stops disagreeing, investing in relationships and asking about the future.
If you notice one of your employees start to disengage, it can be harder to turn things around. Of course there could be other things going on with the employee, but it is something to be aware of.
Retention Needs to be Intentional
Focussing on retention is made up of small decisions every day. It is on-going with each member of your team that consists of compounded stay moments that adds to the culture overtime.
Leadership behaviours, supported by the organization’s HR foundations, impacts the employee experience which has a direct correlation to retention.
Six Ways to Encourage Employees to Stay
Connect with your people.
Set one on one time with each of your team and fiercely protect it, even when it’s busy. Ask about career plans, check in after a difficult situation, ask questions beyond task updates. Listen and value their perspective.
Small gestures carry big weight.
Checking in, sending a “way to go” card, remembering a small detail can build trust. Set reminders to send a thoughtful text or make a phone call to check in on someone. Letting someone else know you are thinking of them and any challenges they may be experiencing opens the door to further communication.
Doing what you say you will.
Being reliable builds trust. Even if you can’t fully do what you said, communicate the reason why and what you tried. When we demonstrate following through, we show the other person we care enough to get back to them. This builds trust.
Be clear on expectations.
When there is a gap between what is expected and what the other person understands the expectation to be, that creates frustration. Communicating clearly the expectations to reduce the gap avoids any misunderstandings that could create a toxic work environment and damage the relationship.
Doing what’s right even if it is uncomfortable.
Trust is built through compounded right actions of honesty and integrity. Choosing to do the right thing, even when no one is watching, adds to our reliability, credibility and shows others you can be counted on.
Be human and show it.
We all make mistakes. We all feel like we need to fake it sometimes. Learning to be vulnerable, admit mistakes and even apologize can go a long way in showing we value the relationship enough to own our mistakes. Plus, it leads the way for others to own their shortcomings as well.
The short answer to the question, “how do I guarantee my good employees will stay” is you can’t. You can’t guarantee your good employees will stay. But you can influence their decision every single day. The way you lead, communicate, and follow through all adds up, that’s what builds a workplace people choose to stay in.
If this has you thinking about your own team, I’ve created a free guide, How to Stop a Good Employee from Quitting. It breaks down three practical areas you can focus on to create more stay moments in your workplace. Get it here.
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